the USMC Birthday Shot recipe
Also known as the Suicide Shot, the Man Shot, and the Pirate Shot
Warning: This shot is NOT for the faint of heart… or just about anyone who hasn’t had the full USMC lobotomy.
Okay – You’re still here? All right. Don’t say we didn’t warn you.
Steps:
- Step 1: Purchase a shot of the cheapest, gut-rot tequila known to man.
- Step 2: Gruffly acquire salt and limes (lemons work too). Knock everyone out of your way doing so. Especially those hot sorority girls at the bar. F’k them. They’ll make you weak. You’re a Marine. You’d rather wrestle sweaty Marines.
- Step 3: Pour Salt on your wrist.
- Step 4: Snort the salt. Slam the shot. Squirt the lime juice in your eyes — In fact, rub it in for good measure.
- Step 5: Scream at the burliest Marine to slap you across the face.
- Step 6: The burliest Marine slaps you across the face.
- Step 7: You laugh, while silently crying inside.
- Step 8: Slap the Marine next to you. Then slap every Marine. Slap party!
- Step 9: Scream a war cry with other teary Marines and prepare to do it all over again, then realize the sailor snuck away—can you believe that squid is talking to those sorority girls? Pussy.
- Step 10: Repeat until arrested.
You’re Welcome
